Too Afraid 2 Love

I’m afraid 2 love you too much
I feel like I’ve lost touch
All I can think about is you
I’ve never known a love so true
I’m lost in heaven’s kiss
My joy has become love’s bliss
You make my hair stand on its ends
Intoxicate me with your heart’s elixir again
My love transcends words I might say
Watch me show my love today
Your smile sings my heart’s melody
But-
I’m afraid to give you this ring
I’m afraid that you might want to leave
I’m afraid you’ll just abandon me.
That is why, I push you away
Yet-
Love does not know fear
Love gives, knowing More is always near
Ignore me, my soul needs you to stay
Trust and Commitment lead the way
It’s time for Fear to run away
Grace opened the door for Love’s new day
If I wasn’t afraid 2 Love you too much

“Until death do us part”, For All!

The Supreme Court did it. They opened the door for marriage for all. Thank you to them and all of the courageous leaders from Harvey Milk to Edith Windsor to Kris Perry and Sandy Stier and the countless people that fought for the rights to be treated as equal American citizens with dignity.  Thank you for your courage. Marriage for All makes marriage more sanctified for everyone.

It makes me wonder how much we heterosexuals who have this constitutional right take it for granted. We file for divorce or separation, after the first major disagreement. We believe marriage is to hard to deal with. Maybe, every once in a while, we should review our vows and remember why we married our partner. Maybe we should be more cautious prior to marrying someone. “Through sickness and in health until death do us part.”. Whether it’s in a courthouse, a church or a courtyard, marriage is sacred. It’s beautiful and it’s an important institution that benefits our society. Its significance is not diminished by whether it is heterosexual or a same sex couple. It’s funny how those who are fighting for desired rights really get it. Whether someone is fighting for the right to vote, for American Citizenship, or the right to simply be recognized as a married couple, they understand. Thanks again, for your courage and the reminder of why, after nearly 25 years, I intend to stay married.

“Until death do us part”, Really?

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When is enough, enough? The honeymoon phase is wonderful in marriage. Everything about your partner is cute: the way they eat, sleep, even their farts aren’t sooo bad. Then, it settles in, you realize that you are with your partner, “until death do us part”. Really, why?! Divorces are relatively easy to obtain. They are very common. Why stick around when it’s hard? Shouldn’t we as women be taken care of by our partners? Should we ever really need to worry about finances? Should we have to worry about addictions? Shouldn’t we be able to communicate with our partners and have fun? Shouldn’t our partners be supportive of us no matter what? Shouldn’t our partners help out around the house? We should not have to worry about infidelity? When it’s broken, should we really try to fix it? Or, should we blindly follow in the footsteps of our divorced parents?

The Supreme Court is considering the legality of Same Sex marriage. It makes me wonder how much we heterosexuals who have this constitutional right take it for granted. We file for divorce or separation, after the first major disagreement. It’s too hard to deal with. Forget about the children or the family unit. Maybe, every once in a while, we should review our vows and remember why we married our partner. Maybe we should be more cautious prior to marrying someone. “Through sickness and in health until death do us part.”, or whatever else, couples agree to during that sacred time. Whether it’s in a courthouse, a church or a courtyard, marriage is sacred. It’s beautiful and it’s an important institution that benefits our society. Its significance is not diminished by whether it is heterosexual or a same sex couple. It’s funny how those who are fighting for desired rights really get it. Whether someone is fighting for freedom from slavery, for American Citizenship, or the right to simply be recognized as a married couple, they understand. Thanks, for your courage and the reminder of why, after nearly 25 years, I intend to stay married.

The Season for Letting Go of Children

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The Season for Letting Go of Children

A Letter to My Child-

Honey,

You have grown into a wonderful, kind, adult that I have had the honor of mothering. I have enjoyed guiding you through the formative years of your life. We’ve shared laughter and tears. You have taught me more than you will ever know. Thank you.

Now it is time for me to let you go. It is time for life to teach you its own lessons without the safety net of running home. You are ready. Yes, you will struggle. The struggle will make you stronger and help you align with the priorities and purpose of your life. You will fall down, but, I have faith that you will always manage to get back up. You have been blessed with the gift of resilience. You are magnificent. Your journey will help you to really know that.

I am letting you go, because I love you. My shadow can be suffocating. I think it is almost as hard for me, as it is for you. But, I am certain that it is time for you to spread your wings and fly. I can’t wait to watch you soar.

Love always,

Mom

Marie Osmond Smile

Quote

“It’s not always a blind man who falls in a pit. Sometimes it’s one who can see.”
-Rumi

 

 Marie Osmond Smile

Verse 1:

I took a road trip out into the sticks

Stopped at the store to pick up a soda and chips

Saw a girl with a Marie Osmond smile

It captured my heart for many a mile

 

Car broke down, who should offer me a ride

The pretty little girl shows up by my side

Well, we sat in her truck and talked for hours

 The sun set and we watched the meteor showers

 

Chorus:

Her eyes sparkled, and lit up the night

Her rosy cheeks lifted to the sky

Her cherry lips framed her teeth like a shrine

That pretty little girl with the Marie Osmond smile

My mind mesmerized by that Marie Osmond smile

 

Verse 2:

You know, I’m not one to kiss and tell,

But her truck was cheaper than a motel

Months passed, her smile was tattooed on my thoughts

Too good to be true, my mind was filled with doubts

 

Found the courage to return for awhile

Asked for the girl with the Marie Osmond smile

They said she quit workin’ and went back to school

 Her heart was broken by a thoughtless fool

 

Chorus:

Her eyes sparkled, and lit up the night

Her rosy cheeks lifted to the sky

Her cherry lips framed her teeth like a shrine

That pretty little girl with the Marie Osmond smile

My mind mesmerized by that Marie Osmond smile

 

Bridge:

 I had her heart in my hands

I was afraid to give love a chance

Now I have to live with my regrets

I know, this smile I’ll never forget

Chorus:

Unwantedness

Unwantedness

You don’t call me anymore.
As I stare outside the icy door,

Clouds grace the cool clear skies.
Moonbeams slice the heart of night.

We abide in the shadows of the dark.
The ghost of our love appears then departs.

The silence of my phone beckons me
My unwantedness envelops my being.

Doves fly towards the morning sun.
Free to land, afraid of none.

Clearly now I see, though I am numb.
Why you don’t call me anymore.

If the system turns away …

Quote

If the system turns away from the abuses inflicted on the guilty, then who can be next but the innocents?”
― Michael Connelly, The Concrete Blonde

Police Brutality

My man just wouldn’t stop strangling me.

I had to fight for my mentality.

Braving my dreams versus my reality.

Called the police to stop the insanity.

Whee-ooh, Whee-ooh

They rolled up with all authority.

Judged and cuffed me because of my emotionality.

Not me, him; hate, could not answer me.

It beat me in the face unshackling my mortality.

Another senseless victim of police brutality,

My man screams as I take my last breath silently.